Although Typical A used the example of her wedding thank you note- this really can apply to any situation:
Don’t overdo it
If you sit down with 100 sheets of blank full-size paper, of course you’re going to be overwhelmed by the task of filling it, so choose pretty stationery that’s appropriately sized. You don’t have to write War & Peace, a short but heartfelt note is perfect.
State your business
The first line is fairly obvious: say what you are thanking them for, for example, ‘Thank you for attending our wedding’. If they weren’t able to attend but sent a card or gift then say something like, ‘Thank you for thinking of us on the occasion of our marriage’.
Thank them for their gift
Don’t just say thanks and nothing else, though. Say not just that you love it, but why, such as: ‘The beautiful vase fits in so well with our decor.’ Better yet, add something to describe what benefit it has to your new married life together. This works especially well for gift registries, cash and gift cards, where you are not so much thanking them for their thoughtfulness in choosing a gift, but for what the registered item means to you. For example, ‘Thanks to the power drill we purchased with your gift card, we’ll now be able to tackle the projects we want to do to make our house a home.’ or, ‘The honeymoon you contributed to was the perfect start to our marriage and we have created so many wonderful, lasting memories.’ See how that will make the recipient feel all warm and fuzzy rather than just a signature on a cheque?
…even if you don’t like it
There’s no way around it, this is always tricky. I know it’s tempting to say you like the life-size medieval unicorn statue just so that Grandma doesn’t get offended, but never lie. It will only come back to bite you when she decides since you loved it so much she will add to your unicorn figurine collection every birthday from now on. Simply thank them for thinking of you and honouring the special occasion with a gift.
Acknowledge special circumstances
There’s a good chance that many of your guests went above and beyond to celebrate your day with you, so be sure to let them know how much you appreciate their effort. Did they have to travel? Did they have to get the night off work during a busy time at their new job? Has she just had a baby and hasn’t slept or worn anything but stretchy pants in months? Don’t mention the pants, but you get the idea. Same goes for anyone who helped out in some way. I’m not a fan of wedding speeches where the couple thanks everyone down to their cousin for recommending the florist, but your thank you notes are an ideal opportunity to do this. Of course you’ll want to make special thanks to your parents, bridal party, MC, and ushers. But don’t forget your sister-in-law for helping you handmake your centrepieces, your uncle for picking out-of-town guests up from the airport and your friend for providing the bracelet for your ’something borrowed’.
Talk about the day
So that the whole thing is not just thankyouthankyouthankyou, it’s nice to mention something about the day, such as ‘It was amazing being surrounded by all of our loved ones,’ ‘I’m so happy that the whole family was in one place for the first time in years,’ or‘The day was everything we imagined’.
Sign off
You might like to leave it at that, or you can wrap it up in a few days depending on circumstances. For example, we had a number of guests who have since become engaged so we could finish off by saying ‘We can’t wait for your big day!,’ (only do this if you are absolutely sure you are invited!). If they were unable to attend, you can express your hope to see them soon.
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